Dear Church,
I’ve been stuck in some sort of writer’s block for about 2-3 years. You see and hear my writing a lot, so it might be hard to understand. It’s not a complete inability to write; it’s more like a heavy pressure, or a lack of ease. I don’t like it.
For context, let me remind you that my Bachelor’s Degree is in Creative Writing (and French Language; a different story for another time). I was already Seminary-bound when I started college, but I knew God gave me the gift of writing, and I wanted to develop and harness those gifts in preparation for a lifetime of ministry, so that’s what I focused on for those four years.
In my Creative Writing classes, I wrote poetry, prose, short stories, and a capstone novella about the Iditarod. Where I excelled (and where I still excel when I’m not stuck) is with short prose. I love painting scenes with words. I love describing how a character feels, and what they might be thinking. That is art to me.
I have many theories about why I’ve had this writer’s block these past few years: Some of it has to do with content-overload from social media and digital communications and the way in which my brain is just ALWAYS TOO FULL. Some of it has to do with daily life as a responsible adult and finding a rhythm that works. I’ve also experienced a lot of grief in these past few years for people I have loved and lost, sadness about fractured relationships, and, like many of us, a general concern about the state of our country and world. A LOT of it– probably most of it– has to do with setting aside intentional and focused time to write.
I feel a little vulnerable. Stick with me. I’m sharing this all with you for a couple of reasons.
First, I’m sharing this because as your pastor I believe there is value in being honest about my spiritual obstacles. My experience is not unique, and it’s similar to the way many people feel about setting aside intentional time for prayer and meditation. Maybe my reflections will help you to know you’re not alone. I trust you to hold my vulnerability with grace and support, as you have already shown me many times, and we’re on this journey together.
Second, and more excitingly, I’m sharing this with you because I recently got some cool writing-related news (I buried the lede a little bit here). I’ve been asked to become a regular writer for the UCC Daily Devotional. This is a BIG DEAL for me. Being a member of the Stillspeaking Writers’ Group is a dream I’ve had since college and, to be honest, I had almost given it up in the midst of my writer’s block. But this feels really right; I feel a lot of clarity about it.
I’ll be writing twice a month and likely for the UCC Lenten Devotional for 2025. Each devotional has a 300 word limit– right in that “short prose” range I mentioned earlier. I don’t know when my first devotional debuts, but I’ll be sure to let you know!
The call to join the Stillspeaking Writers’ Team came just a couple weeks after I preached a sermon straight to my own soul. I’ve been discerning how I can develop more consistent and sustainable habits and routines, to find more balance in my life. The beginning of that sermon was about the most boring parable in the Bible. It’s in the Gospel of Mark, and it goes: ‘The kingdom of God is as if someone would scatter seed on the ground, and would sleep and rise night and day, and the seed would sprout and grow.’ The parable is so simple and obvious. I joked that it is like the plot of a classroom science poster.
That Sunday, I said something like this: “The Kingdom of God is in the dailyness. It’s in the habit-building; it’s in the follow-through; it’s in waking up again after a major loss; it’s in the physical therapy; it’s in showing up.” As I said those words, I remembered the advice of my friend David Graham, former poetry professor at Ripon College, which was next to the church I served in Wisconsin. David would often say about writing: “It’s not about the quality or the quantity; it’s about the dailyness.”
It really hit me on that Sunday, and since then I’ve been praying for “dailyness.” Dailyness in my prayer life, in my writing life, in my relationships, in my care for my body, in my care for my home, in my care for God’s earth.
The call to write for the UCC Daily Devotional was such a “God Wink”— in the name, in the timing, and in the big-picture reminder of God’s call on my life. My hope is that the invitation is the kick in the pants I have needed to find ease in my writing again.
Thank you for reading this far into my reflection. I know it’s really long. Like I said earlier, I feel a little bit vulnerable, as if I just shared a personal journal entry with the entire church (although, rest assured my personal journal entries are not this linear). But I also feel confident in the relationship we have with each other, that it’s helpful and important for you to know about this moment of personal discernment* and spiritual growth that I’m in.
Before I finish up this piece of writing here (maybe I’m coming out of the writer’s block right now), I want to share a couple of things about my schedule. It has already been a heavier travel summer than I anticipated (or recognized when I was putting it together). From June 26-29, I was in the Poconos, Pennsylvania, for a memorial service for my maternal grandmother who passed away two years ago. From July 4-7, I was in Roanoke, Virginia with some of my childhood friends. Both trips were wonderful, but certainly messing with my dailyness! Next week, from July 17-20th, I will be taking my daughter to the UCC Regional Youth Event with our friends from South Haven UCC, but I will be back on Sunday July 21st for worship. Then, I will be on family vacation, out of the country, from July 30-August 13. Rev. Catherine will lead worship on 8/4 and Rev. Elizabeth Dilley will lead worship on 8/11. After that, I have no plans to go anywhere for a while!
I also want to share that the renovation project is making forward movement, even if it feels like it hasn’t started yet. There are so many things happening behind the scenes to prepare us for a smooth 16 week start-to-finish renovation. It has been an absolute pleasure to work with the folks at Fortney and Weygandt (General Contractor), Arcus Architecture, Richardson Design, and of course our own volunteers and leadership. I am absolutely giddy with excitement to watch this all unfold.
Many, many blessings, much love, and congratulations for reading all of this.
With Gratitude,
Pastor Joanna
*A note on the term personal discernment: LCC is stuck with me. Often when a pastor uses the term discernment, it’s in regards to the search and call process, or where to go next in ministry. I have absolutely no intentions or interest in leaving LCC. If I use the term discernment, I am using it in regards to how I feel called to develop my ministry and leadership here at LCC, in Lakewood, with you all. Thanks be to God.